Many people complain that the career or broader life issues they're grappling with just circle endlessly in their head. I've experienced this myself.
There is also A LOT you can do to help yourself with this issue. It sounds a bit strange, but try making a coaching appointment with yourself, to think in a structured way about what's bothering you. Give yourself at least 20-30 minutes and get a notebook to jot down your questions and responses. Then apply this coaching model:
1. ESTABLISH A FOCUS
Identify a single issue.
To do this, ask yourself questions like:
"What specific outcome do I want from this conversation?"
"What would I like to be different?"
"What's troubling me most about this situation?"
For example, say you think you want to set up your own business but you haven't a clue about how to start, or even if it's really 100% what you want, and how do you find out if it's what you definitely want without starting (which you don't know how to do)? (spot the circle??!).
"What's troubling me MOST about this situation?"
"I don't know if I have the skills to run my own business. I don't even know what those skills are."
"OK, so what would I like to be different at the end of this 20 minute talk with myself?"
"I'd like some ideas for finding out the skills needed."
Perfect!
2. EXPLORE POSSIBILITIES
This is brainstorming territory. Some good questions are:
"What options or approaches can I think of?"
"What are the positives and negatives of each option?"
"What have I seen work for others?"
"What else?"
"What has worked for me in the past?"
Continuing our example...
"What approaches can I think of?"
"Well, I guess I could ask other people who've started a business what they think are important skills. And I could google a bit, there must be some websites which could help me."
"That's great! What else could I do?"
"I don't know. This is too difficult. Can I go and make a cup of tea now....?"
"Later. Think: what's worked for me in the past when I've needed to learn about a new topic?"
"Usually I read books. Hmm, so I could have a look on Amazon as well. That's perked me up a bit, I love buying books. This is fun!"
3. PLAN ACTIONS
Start to pin yourself down.
"What do I need to do now?"
"Well X just started her own business and she's very approachable, I could talk to her. I can't think of anyone else right now but maybe she would know of other people."
"Good... When will I do this?"
"I'll call her tomorrow morning."
Put this in your diary, and keep going until you have committed to several actions.
4. REMOVE OBSTACLES
Make sure you don't leave yourself with any excuses...
"What might stop me doing this?"
"Feeling insecure. X might think I'm crazy to even consider having my own business. Maybe she won't even want to talk to me."
"What can I do to overcome this obstacle?"
"What's the worst that can happen? If she says she's too busy, I'll be a bit upset but I could still ask her for some names. Someone will speak to me: I know I'd help if the roles were reversed."
5. RECAP
Go over your notes and ask yourself:
"What did I learn today?", or "Looking back over the conversation, what else comes to mind?"
"That there's always something I can do to get the ball rolling. I feel much better. The circle is broken!"
Good luck with straightening your own circles...!
If you are still stuck, consider getting professional guidance. There is nothing wrong with asking for help when you need it. Here's a start:
Sarah Cooper is a career coach who specializes in working with people who want to follow their passions, express their creativity or help people or society in some way. Kick start your new life by signing up to Sarah's FREE mini e-course 5 Keys to Finding Freedom By Doing What You Love at http://www.cowsfrommywindow.com
No comments:
Post a Comment