Now before you go thinking this is a professional assessment of child behavior, let me be clear: The child I am talking about is a dog.
My niece and her boyfriend brought their dog with them recently on a visit. They arrived very late and most of the house was asleep. Those of us still awake spoke in hushed tones, greeting each other with happy whispers and welcomes. The dog, a beagle, had had a long car ride and was VERY excited. She was sniffing and "tracking" smells from one room to another. A delightful little creature that didn't bark or misbehave, particularly, but was full of energy... at 1:30 am... toenails clicking rapidly along the hardwood floors as she cased the joint.
After getting them set up we said our good nights and went upstairs.
The next morning I come to find out that our niece slept in their truck... with the dog... Had she been past her spry 20s, waking up every half hour to move her hip off the gearshift might likely have killed her, as it would me, having one foot in the grave here in my 40s as it is. Sleeping in the cab of a pick-up truck is not presently on my bucket list.
So the reason she chose such stellar sleeping arrangements was because the dog, essentially her child, wouldn't settle down and she was afraid it would eat something or chew up a DVD player or pee on the floor... So they put her in the truck for the night, by herself at first. But apparently she was whining because she was as excited about sleeping with a steering wheel in her rib cage as I would be. So after 15 minutes of whining and howling, my niece caved and slept in the truck... with the dog... all night... in half hour increments...
Due to various scenarios causing potential anxiety anticipating a sequel of the previous night, they put the critter in "Doggie day care" for the rest of that day and the next night. This is where I decided to blog about it... In chatting about the ins and outs of doggie day care, I found out that this small dog got to spend the next 24 hours on an 8 acre farm running and having a ball. Cool, what a great thing. Then she mentioned that she paid extra for a few things... Like what? I said.
"Well, we bought her a nature walk and a play date."
"I'm sorry, you bought her w h a t ?"
"And a bedtime story."
"You bought your dog, who gets to run her butt off and play, ya know, like a DOG, an additional "nature walk, play date and BEDTIME STORY?!"
Um, now I'm a rational person and I understand liking your pet. I really do, but WTF?
It's a dog, people.
They drink from the toilet.
Do they really need a bedtime story? The one night they aren't with you?!!?!
O
M
G
It ocurred to me that this pattern might be an indication of future parenting techniques. The anxiety of the kid acting up late at night, so you attempt to remedy the situation but eventually cave in and cater to the child's manuipulation of the situation rather than figure out a comprimise on your terms.
And then the whole buying crazy extras designed for you, not the dog child just cracked me up big time.
I am in the wrong business! Pet sitting is the thing!
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